Posts Tagged ‘How To Get My Ex Back’

Ways to get Your Ex Back

Ways to get Your Ex Back

If you have just broken off with your ex and you want him or her back, I’ve got good news and bad news. The bad news is there is just no fixed formula for how to do it. But the good news is there are certain fixed principles that when applied work like a charm every time. So what are these principles and how do you apply them?

Firstly, there is the idea of wanting what you cannot have. It is in our nature to want what another person has that you do not. For this very reason, you should distance yourself from your ex. This allows him or her to look at you from afar and in a new way. But what you must do is to change. You should look to improve yourself in the areas where you perceive yourself to be week, paying close attention to those areas that you think were responsible for your break up. Concentrate on trying to be the very best person that you can be. Also take the opportunity to make some new friends and catch up with friends you have not been in touch with for some time. The purpose is to enable your ex to see the improved version of you having many friends who find you friendly, fun to be with and attractive. This is not to make your ex jealous but simply to improve yourself so that you feel better about yourself.

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Secondly comes the principle of meeting emotional needs. One of the singly most important things that keep a couple united is being able to complete each other’s emotional needs. Obviously, the emotional needs of both sexes are for the most part entirely at odds with each other and each person’s emotional needs is unique but on the whole I will tell you about the primary emotional need of both sexes. This is tue, no matter what kind of man or woman your ex is.

The primary emotional need of a man is respect. Respect entails honor, admiration, esteem, being looked up to etc. So if you want to get your ex back, you must show that you are the woman who can meet his emotional needs especially for respect the way that no other woman can. You should never try to make him look bad or even put him down in public. You should the occasion was to complement him, congratulate him, encourage him and sing his praises especially in public. This will endear him back to you. It works like gangbusters, believe me.

As a man you should know that, the most important emotional requirement for a woman is security. Security involves love, protection, relationship, companionship, being there for her etc. To win your ex back, you need to find ways to make her secure. You should always reassure her of your love (after you win her back, that is), show her that you are strong especially when under pressure, honor your commitments to her, do things for her (especially those she finds difficult or inconvenient to do) and spend quality time with her. This is what will draw your ex-girlfriend back to you.

So after you have made some changes to yourself, you can plan how to meet up with your ex. Find an opportune time when you know he or she would be most receptive. Just ask your ex for a no presure meeting, maybe for a coffee, a snack or maybe even a drink after work. If there is a special event going on, you can invite your ex to join you. It will probably be better to try and go out as a group. The idea here is to allow your ex to see the ‘new’ improved you and to have a really great time with you. Do this a couple of times, but do try to ensure that it comes off as being natural. Do not pressure your ex into anything. Whenever you are together, intentionally find ways to meet your ex’s primary emotional need. Do so as often as possible. Soon your ex will notice the changes in you and will be touched by your actions to meet his or her emotional needs. This will put your relationship on track to be restored. If you follow the right strategy, before you can blink your ex will be back in your arms.

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Someone Tell Me How to Get my Ex-girlfriend Back

Someone Tell Me How to Get my Ex-girlfriend Back

That’s what I wanted to know and I wanted to know it desperately. I felt absolutely lousy without her. We have been together for nearly 6 years and now its all over. To say that I could hardly believe it is an understatement. For the first seven days of our breakup I was completely lost. I was in a daze when I spoke to one of my buddies. “Forget her,” he said, “Life’s like that…these things happen,” was his philosophical reply. Sure, easy for HIM to say.

Then another friend of mine blurted out “Seriously, are you just going to put up with this like some sort of whimp? Do something, get her back…go hook up with someone else and make her jealous…let her see what she’s missing. That’ll do the job.” No offence to him but I am not the champion stud who draws women like a magnet. I’m a little too timid to give these things a try. Well, that put paid to his suggestion.

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After a few more well-intentioned but totally misplaced comments from more buddies, one of my closest friends said something that I shocked me at first because it was completely unexpected. He said, “Go along with the breakup.” You could have knocked me over with a feather. Here I was asking how to get her back and he was telling me to go along with the idea of breaking up. I would have walked out of our conversation if he did not say the next thing he said, “If you don’t agree with her about the breakup, you will never win her back.” That got me all ears.

Then he ran through a point by point strategy for me to follow.

The first step was to do something about myself, not just call her to make up (which was what I desperately wanted to do). I still remember the afternoon my friend and I enrolled as members of a gym. It cost me a bomb since the package included a once-a-week workout with a personal trainer. So that started my routine of pumping iron, jogging, stretching, sweating (lots of it) for the following 6 weeks. The first week or so was torture. The only thing that kept me fulfilling that crazy program were my buddies words echoing in my head, “You want her back, don’t you?”

Surprisingly to me, the regime got easier as the weeks passed. After 6 agonizing weeks, I was feeling great! Losing 17 pounds had a lot to do with that, too. But working out wasn’t the only thing that my friend did with me those 6 weeks.

He took me through a painstaking journey of self-evaluation. We talked, he questioned, I answered, I asked, he advised. He became my sounding board for all the faults I had in my life. Quite often i did not like what I was hearing. But as they say, good medicine always tastes bitter. Lastly I understood just what type of man I was and knew what I had done wrong in our relationship. Of course, not everything that went wrong was my fault, but this was not about her; it was about me.

So I made it a point to change. It wasn’t easy but after weeks of doing things differently, it became a habit. I quit smoking and dumped all my girlie magazines in the trash. I started to be more generous and less fussy. I began to like kids, something that I never did before. All in all, after about 6 weeks, I had changed both internally and externally.

Now came the challenge of meeting with my ex-girlfriend. I was really grateful that i had a friend who was there to give me encouragement and a helping hand. He was having a birthday party for his young child. So he invited both my ex and myself. Before the party, he told me exactly what to do and what not to. He did not have to repeat himself once, as i was completely focused on what he was saying.

We were all there when the party began. I said hello to my ex-girlfriend and she gave me a radiant smile. I could see she was really suprised to see the new sculpted me. The program went smoothly and I stuck to the game plan like glue. The main thing my friend told me to do was, “Play with the kids…treat them gently…have fun with them.” So I did. I am sure i have done just about everything Barny the purple dinosaur does with kids.

It must have worked because the next day, my ex calls me and we chatted. She told me how surprised she was to see my new fondness with children. I was ecstatic!

To cut a long story short, I’m happy to say that 5 months and many more meetings after that, my girlfriend and I are back together again.

Hopefully that should get you started but if you need more help and more great articles to to www.fastrelationshipfix.com

If you have just gone through a breakup, I hope you will be encouraged by my story. Maybe you can see yourself in it, also and do something to get your ex-girlfriend back.

Winning Back Your Ex

Winning Back Your Ex

When you break up with someone you love, it is often tempting to try to get back together with your ex as soon as possible. The pangs of loneliness can have a tremendous toll on your psyche, prompting you to act impulsively. Some would keep calling their ex, show up everywhere their ex happens to be, keep profusely apologizing and assuring their ex that they have changed, some even shed tears and beg their ex to take them back. If you have an inclination to do such things, DON’T.

The appropriate thing to do is to take a break from the relationship. Agree with your ex that not being together may be is the best thing for both of you for the time being. Then go away and use the time to look within yourself so you can see how you can in any way improve. The idea is to make yourself the best person you can become. Eventually this will put you in a good place to win back your ex. So take a good look at yourself. Be honest. Where you have character flaws (especially when your charater flaws might be partly responsible for you breaking up), then admit it to yourself. Don’t play the blame game (‘…that was her fault, not mine’) or justify yourself (‘…I admit I was wrong, but what about him? He was at fault, too’) or give excuses (‘…I’m only human, can’t she see that?’).

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As you take stock of your own behavior and character, weed out the flaws you have (we all have some, so admit it). Whether it’s your flirtatious nature, short temper, pride, selfishness, controlling attitude, bossiness, dishonesty or anything else, treat it seriously and get rid of it fast. This has already hurt your ex and if you continue this way, you will hurt other people eventually, too.

While you are moving forward on your quest to improving yourself, don’t forget to take the opportunity to see if your ex still retains some if not all of their feelings for you. This would indicate whether it’s going to be worthwhile trying to win your ex back. There are some tell-tale signals that indicate your ex still has the hearts for you.

Firstly, is he or she trying to make you jealous? A relationship started as a result of a rebound is often an indication that either your ex is feeling very lonely without you or is trying to make you jealous. So if you see him or her starting a relationship on the rebound, don’t panic. It usually won’t last. Furthermore, you have an edge over your ex’s new partner because you already know your ex well whereas the new guy or girl needs to start knowing your ex from scratch. And as I mentioned, the rebound relationship could just be their way of trying to make you jealous.

Secondly, does your ex show displeasure when some other person of the opposite sex gets close to you? Your ex more often than not will try and deny being upset, but you know them well enough to know whether that is a lie or not. Being displeased is a sure indication that your ex still has feelings for you.

Thirdly, does your ex contact you for any small reason? I broke up with my ex because she migrated to another country and there was no way for us to carry on our relationship. Subsequently she found another guy but when she returned to my country for a visit a year later, she called me and we met up. Everyone could see she still had feelings for me then.

If there are these indications, your chances of winning your ex back are good, if you do your part in improving yourself. But even if these indications are not clearly seen, your self-improvement would go a long way in getting back together with your ex in due course.

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Getting back your ex girlfriend

So you’ve just received the dreaded ‘Dear John’ letter from your girlfriend telling you it’s all over. You can hardly believe what you are reading, even though you’ve read it for the umpteenth time. Your initial base reaction would be to phone her and beg her to return. Your mates inform you that you should bite the bullet and get down on your knees to tell her how sorry you are and explain to her that you are going to do whatever it takes to change. But maybe other friends of yours say tol you that you should let her go and start over. You are kind of confused, your heart’s beating like a drum, you are shakey, uptight and have no idea of what you are mant to do. You start to panic.

Stop, before you do something you’ll really regret later. As difficult to believe as it may seem, both sets of your friends have got it wrong.

The thing to do is not rush over and talk to her, beg her to come back or confess your love for her. Neither should you forget about her and start anew immediately. You might find yourself in another relationship on the rebound and lose any chance of getting back your ex-girlfriend.

The first thing you should do is to agree with your ex-girlfriend about the breakup. Whatever differences you two may have, the best thing to do now is to either come to some compromise or if that is not possible, at least agree to disagree and remain friends while you take a break from each other. You may be full of regret and want to patch things up so that you can get back together immediately, but if you act on impulse, you’ll most probably drive your ex-girlfriend even further away. So take some time now to pull yourself together, take a step back and evaluate things.

When you are apart from each other, take steps to put in some necessary changes in yourself. At the same time, don’t wallow in self pity. Use this freedom you now have to make some new friends, but don’t start any serious relationship with anyone else as it will only be out of a rebound. Give yourself at least a few weeks apart from your ex-girlfriend before contacting her again. In the meantime, think through what went wrong and what you did to contribute to it. Do not focus on her wrongs, just on your own. The first step in getting back your ex-girlfriend is to change yourself.

When the time is right, you can take steps to meet up with your ex-girlfriend again. If she’s ready, do not make her. You can try again at a more opportune time. If she’s hesitant about meeting up, just assure her you only want to talk as friends. Make this moment lighthearted and fun. Remember back to the time when you first started dating? Be that man again, only better. Give your ex-girlfriend what she and every other lady needs and that is security. Demonstrait to her your willingness to make all the right changes in yourself so that she will always feel safe. When you can convince her that you will provide this fundamental thing, you have taken a giant step towards getting your ex back.

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How to Get an Ex boyfriend Back

If you want to get your ex-boyfriend back, let me advise you to take one step back and do some thinking first. Lets face it the majority of break ups because there was something wrong in the first place. Perhaps you should consider if he’s the right man for you. Once you can determine that, then you can think about getting him back.

To consider whether he’s the right man for you would involve examining a few things such as his maturity of character and your compatibility together. Let’s look at each of these one at a time.

A mature man is one who displays good character qualities such as patience, kindness, love, gentleness, generosity, temperateness, humility, honesty, teachability, submission etc. These things do not show themselves on dates. When you’re out on a date, usually he’s at his best behavior. It’s when there is pressure or when some bad thing happens unexpectedly that his true colors will show. Think back to the times when things have taken place randomly or during the normal course of life. When he faced opposition at work, when somebody mistreated him, when he gets a raw deal, when someone spilled a drink on his shirt, when someone cut in front of him in a queue, what was his response? With anger, vengefulness, cursing, impatience, lying or pride? Or was it with the good character qualities above? Of course, no one is Mr. Perfect, but at least some of the qualities must be evident in him and the others are being developed.

Next, consider how compatible you are. Being compatible means things like having complementary personalities (not personality clashes), having the same type of sense of humor, interests, likes and dislikes and general direction in life. Again, you won’t find yourself compatible with him in all of these, but being compatible to the extent that is good enough for you is important to make a relationship last. If he stacks up with you in the majority of these, only then could you said to be compatible.

Mature character and strong compatibility are what to look for in Mr. Right. This also means that YOU, too should develop the same qualities to become Ms. Right for him. After all, a successful relationship takes two persons who are not just in love but mature and compatible with each other.

If you know absolutely that your ex boyfriend in the man you are meant to be with, you can now consider how you can get him back. The surefire way that never fails is to show him that you are the best woman who can meet his emotional needs. That is the way you get under his skin and push his buttons.

And here’s a man’s primary emotional need. It does not matter who your man is, this is his primary need.

It is respect. That means to be honored, esteemed, valued and looked up to. If you can give your ex-boyfriend the respect that he craves, he will be yours forever. So give some thought as to how you can show him that you can give him more honor, trust and respect than every other woman. It works every time.

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